Foundations of a Godly Marriage
This is part of a series I’m writing for Christian men, husbands, and fathers.
Many articles are written from a woman’s point of view. Though I’m not alone, I wanted to make a concerted effort to ensure that a man’s viewpoint is represented.
I recently posted an article on the topic. If you haven’t had a chance to read it yet, it’s entitled Embracing Being a Christian Husband and Father in 2024.
In this series, we’ll discuss several topics including communication, parenting decisions (including disciplining), priorities in marriage, navigating challenges, forgiveness, reconciliation, and much more.
For now, let’s delve into the Foundations of a Godly Marriage.
What does the Bible say about marriage?
Since the beginning of time, it was established that marriage was between a man and a woman. In 2015, Obama’s Supreme Court decided to unilaterally change the definition of marriage to serve their evil agenda. At the time, I said I believed that decision would forever change the US and the world as we knew it. And it did.
Marriage would no longer be just between a man and a woman. With their landmark case, marriage was changed to be between consenting adults (regardless of their gender).
Many believe this was just the beginning of many sick and perverted things yet to come. But I digress.
As Christians, our belief system and authority come from God. Instead of a corrupt government, made up of sinful human beings, let’s discuss what the infallible Word of God has to say about the subject.
– How does the Bible define marriage? (Who’s a marriage between?)
In both the Old and the New Testament, the Bible clearly defines marriage as between a man and a woman.
“This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” – Genesis 1:24
“Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: ‘Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?’
“4 ‘Haven’t you read the Scriptures?’ Jesus replied. ‘They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’ 5 And He said, ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ 6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” – Matthew 19:3-6
“As a young man marries a young woman, so will your Builder marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you.” – Isaiah 62:5
– How many genders does the Bible say there are?
Unlike those evildoers in society who say there are over 100 genders/pronouns, the Bible states that since the beginning of time, there have only been two genders.
“So, God created human beings in His own image. In the image of God, He created them; male and female He created them.” – Genesis 1:27
“He created them male and female, and He blessed them and called them ‘human.’” – Genesis 5:2
Since the newest manuscripts of the Bible are nearly 2000 years old, I’ll take their word over that of a woke individual who does the will of Satan.
Are there commandments for marriage?
Although there is no commandment, thou shalt give up your Saturdays for your wife’s “honey-do” list, here’s some of what the Bible says for husbands and wives.
– Commandments for the husband (in marriage)
Love your wife – Ephesians 5:25, 28, 33
It’s interesting how God’s command for men is to “love” our wives. And do you know why? Because men will respect their wives without question.
However, most men see love as a “touchy-feely” emotion that doesn’t come naturally.
When in reality, Jesus says, love is one of the most manly things a man could do. Being prior-military, this is something I can relate to.
“There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” – John 15:13
And you feel a different “love” for your wife than for your kids, a family member, or a friend. That’s because love is seen differently depending on who you’re referring to.
In the Bible, there are four words used for love. Agape, eros, phileo, and storge (astorgous). Eros is where we get the word “erotic” from. Most people can pretty well figure that one out.
Phileo, where we get the name “Philadelphia” is a brotherly love. That’s why “Philadelphia” is known as the “City of Brotherly Love.” Not to be confused with familial love.
Storge (or astorgous) is familial love. Some family members are usually referenced here. Your love for your kids or siblings would be astorgous.
Which leaves agape, the highest form of love. This is everlasting and sacrificial love. Most men will say they love (eros) their wives. Perhaps even love (phileo) them. But God’s Word tells us that we need to agape our wives.
“For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up His life for her.” – Ephesians 5:25
Love and lust are completely different. Lust is an emotion. The butterflies you get when you see or hear her voice. That’s an emotion. Agape love, on the other hand, is a choice. I choose to love my wife and she chooses to love me. “In the good times and the bad. In sickness and in health.” It’s a decision we choose to make and keep.
– Commandments for the wife (in marriage)
Submit to your husband – Ephesians 5:22, 24
Respect your husband – Ephesians 5:33
Some women will hear the words “submit to your husband” and become visually (even audibly) offended. That’s because the women’s liberation movement (100% founded by Satan) has taught them otherwise.
It sickens me the number of memes I’ve seen of women who “rule” over their husbands.
Recently, I disagreed with my brother-in-law over one such picture his wife posted. I was called out by name as if it applied to my marriage too.
He knows how I feel about it. I’m not against him supporting his wife. But I have a problem when it comes to anti-biblical things.
Nonetheless, the Bible tells us that women are to submit and respect their husbands. Why do you think that is?
We know that the creation and fall of man (Genesis 3) have much to do with the “submit” portion. So why respect too?
As men respect others naturally, women love in the same way. God made them to be very compassionate, loving, and nurturing. Perhaps that’s why most athletes will give a shoutout to their mom on national television – but not their dad.
Women are very emotional beings. They embody love in all its forms. And they will show respect to others when they feel loved. If they feel unloved, they’ll undoubtedly act disrespectfully.
In marriage, when a woman feels unloved by her husband, she’ll act disrespectfully. When a man feels disrespected by his wife, he’ll act unlovingly. Dr. Emerson Eggerichs (the author of the book “Love and Respect”) refers to this as the “Crazy Cycle.”
For a marriage to work according to God’s design, the husband and the wife must be willing to love, respect, and forgive each other.
There’s so much more that could be said that can’t be covered in this one article. If you’d like to continue, next we’ll discuss the Priorities for a Successful Christian Marriage.
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